The Words are the Same, but the Meanings have Changed

Here is a list of words and phrases that  have taken on a new meaning since Dylan was born.  Motherhood really does change EVERYTHING!

• Sleeping in
• Before Dylan (BD): Sleeping until at least 11am, sometimes noon, and then lazily lounging around the house, maybe making some breakfast, and doing whatever I might fancy at the moment
• After Dylan (AD):  Sleeping until 6:30am, making some coffee and trying to figure out how to accomplish everything that needs to be done and still get a shower!

• Showering
• BD: A way to stay clean. There were plenty of opportunities during the day. Sometimes replaced by a relaxing bubble bath, with lights out and candles lit.
• AD: Immediately after the nap begins, a chance to jump in and jump out within five minutes, remaining as quiet as possible (no dropping shampoo bottles!) to not wake the baby who's crib is on the other side of the wall.  (maybe we should move his crib)

• Makeup
• BD: A fun opportunity to play with the way I look, often making me feel pretty.
• AD: Something that often happens in the car (only when someone else is driving!) and generally is only applied in a failed attempt to hide the circles under my eyes.

• Coffee
• BD: A bitter drink that I wanted to like because it smelled like it should taste so good, but really tasted like cigarette ashes.
• AD: A bitter drink that I have learned to like because it keeps me going, going, going....

• Going out
• BD: A fun opportunity to get out of the house and find entertainment.  This could occur on a whim and could last as long as we wanted it to.
• AD: A two hour scramble to get him and all accompanying equipment into the car, with the potential to be fun or disastrous.  Outings usually end in leaving early because of extreme exhaustion manifesting itself as inconsolable crying.

• Love
• BD: A strong, genuine feeling of caring towards my family and friends
• AD: An unexplainable feeling that life wasn't complete until this little man arrived in the world.   The knowledge that I would do absolutely anything for him. The fact that he can fart and it makes me smile (if that's not love, I don't know what is!)

Finding the Silver Lining

I've done a lot of complaining and feeling sorry for myself over the past few weeks.  I still have trouble picking up Dylan and still can't drive myself easily.  I feel very dependent on others, which is not an easy role for me accept.  The more I think about it though, I realize how lucky I am that I have a little extra time to spend around my family.  Chad has taken some time off work here and there, and my Mom has been coming over to help out too. I get to see Dylan more than I would if I were working every day.  I think that maybe I've been wasting time feeling sorry for myself.  I should really be trying to enjoy this extra time that I have to bond with the people that I love (and who obviously love me to take such good care of a big whiner).  My mom came over yesterday to help with Dylan and she vacuumed, did laundry, washed dishes and found a little extra time to pick some violets for me.  Funny how such a small gesture can change your mood.  Thanks Mom!

It was only a matter of time

One of the many reasons I fell for Chad was the way he acted around children.  Whenever we were at a family gathering, he would usually disappear.  I always knew that I could follow the kids' laughter to find him.  It was (and still is) so endearing to watch them all flock to him, and to watch him play games like he was one of them.  One of the activities his younger cousins liked most was to line up and run at him one by one.  When they reached him he would pick them up and throw them as high in the air as he could.  He moved on to playing with his nieces as the cousins grew up, and now he has a live in buddy to play with every day. He has already taught this game to Dylan which sometimes causes me to gasp in fear.  (You can tell by the way his head is cut off that I didn't expect him to go quite so high)  Dylan enjoys it immensely though, and lets out his hearty belly laugh.  I think I'm going to have to lighten up or just stop watching these things. :) 

Dylan is one lucky little boy to have Chad as a father.